ain't it just like the present to be showing up like this

Oh, I know it's not yet 11pm and I'm having a drink to counter irrational emotions and I've been updating this stupid thing too often and my hands are bleach-burned from the kind of scrubbing I usually associate with the influences of our sex-crazed house ghost but this, this poem:

Handy Guide

By Dean Young

Avoid adjectives of scale.

Dandelion broth instead of duck soup.

Don’t even think you’ve seen a meadow, ever.

The minor adjustments in our equations

still indicate the universe is insane,

when it laughs a silk dress comes out its mouth

but we never put it on. Put it on.

Cry often and while asleep.

If it’s raw, forge it in fire.

That’s not a mountain, that’s crumble.

If it’s fire, swallow.

The heart of a scarecrow isn’t geometrical.

That’s not a diamond, it’s salt.

That’s not the sky but it’s not your fault.

My dragon may be your neurotoxin.

Your electrocardiogram may be my fortune cookie.

Once an angel has made an annunciation,

it’s impossible to tell him he has the wrong address.

Moonlight has its own befuddlements.

The rest of us can wear the wolf mask if we want

or look like reflections wandered off.

Eventually armor, eventually sunk.

You wanted love and expected what?

A parachute? Morphine? A gold sticker star?

The moment you were born—

you have to trust others because you weren’t there.

Ditto death.

The strongest gift I was ever given

was made of twigs.

It didn’t matter which way it broke.

Source: Poetry (November 2011).