Well, I think one thing I need to do is some spring cleaning. I feel like everything is so cluttered and messy right now. Last night, I cleaned out my fridge and wiped everything down, threw out the old sauces that were hiding in the very back, and organized the shelves. I did the same thing for my dry pantry. I packed up all the food I keep buying for the food pantry and got it set up by the door so I'll actually remember to take it. I cleaned the kitchen, although that happens every night. I also got started on the bedroom, which is always a really hard place for me to keep tidy for some reason. I kind of think there's some kind of psychological aspect to that, but maybe I'm just a fucking slob with too many clothes. At any rate, I need to start moving my sweaters downstairs and bring up my warm weather stuff.

Another thing I need to do is to clean out my cabinets and replace all my little mismatched thrift store dishes with the fancy beautiful new clay set I recently spent too much money on. It's so funny, thinking of that makes me remember a time, years and years ago now, when I got lightly teased for having none of my stuff match - a completely silly comment that I got irrationally bent out of shape about. Thinking about it as I look at my hip new dishes, I want to take out my dumb brain and question it about what it hangs onto. Little gloomy depression brain, do you only remember behaving badly over a gentle ribbing, and not any of the nice things people have said to you over the years? But it's not true - I remember the good things too, every day. 

I'd hoped to run today, since I'm starting to feel like I'm seeing some progress in that regard, but of course the moment I get out of my grooming it starts to rain. I suppose a sleepy, rainy day isn't the worst thing. I'm cooking some sort of... pasta e ceci and chickpea stew thing for dinner, which fits pretty well with the general gloom of the day. I should take advantage of it all and finish up my cleaning. Although I probably will put on my windbreaker and try a few miles at least, so long as it isn't pouring. I have a few scraps of chicken to give to my crows if they're up and around.

I know I wrote about it a little yesterday, but I'm really thinking that if the filter color of light changes in the different seasons, and autumn is purple and winter is white/yellow, then I think spring in the valley must truly be blue. This is my early morning, and the light outside looked like such a strange shade of indigo before the sun came up. Or maybe I've looked too long at the blue jays standing on my porch railing under the feeder, just outside my window.