Today I categorize as "a hard day." I'm struggling this week. I don't mind saying. It's not work or anything, I just don't have my heart on quite straight.
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My mentor at work swung by my cube to check on a laser I was working on last week at a certain point. He hung on the wall and said "Do you want help with that?"
I leaned out of my chair and said, "Nooaahhhhh?"
He said, "I recognize a married yes!!!"
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I think "indirect online rants against people who will never read it on your own social media" is some of the lowest, tackiest form of behavior. Surely evidence of a malformed or immature psyche, and often the grim sign of a narcissist who prefers only the sound of their own beloved voice over developing, you know, like actual communication skills or graceful problem solving. I try, mostly, to keep my dim unspoken interpersonal rages to myself until they become the hard, bright diamonds of my ruthless and Disney-witchlike personality.
That said.
Dear Pokemon Adults of Gypsy Hill Park, 9:20 pm on a Weekday,
First off, can I say: I'm so glad you're here!
I'm not being a snarkyass bitch, motherfuckers! Welcome! This is a BEAUTIFUL resource! I try to come here every other day or so, and it's genuinely great to see more people taking advantage of a free natural space. These spaces only get protected when enough people care about them to keep them up and being a thing. And this is sure a good one. The trees are huge! There are fireflies!
Hell, and I don't care if it is because you're playing a dumb kids game on your phone. I know all about pretending for exercise. For example, right now, I'm listening to symphonic Viking metal and pretending to be really tearing into it on the fields of Ragnorok and it's like pow oh man swords yeah now nobody's falling down it's like the only way I can get off while also running! An alternate scenario I have is that I'm charging or defending Little Roundtop and it doesn't even matter which side: it's about VALOR and HORSES and GOING FAST. Sometimes I pretend I'm just that chapter in ASOIaF of Jaime Lanister taking the Riverlands and I bet his hair looked really good and not stupid the whole dang time. I guess maybe I could analyze why all my running fantasies are related to war, but that's neither here nor there to the Pokemans. The important thing is that you're out there getting exercise and enjoying the night, just like me!
But We. Have. To Talk.
You guyssss, it's such a big park. It's not that I reject your right to be on the only running path, but guys, I have five miles more to do tonight, and this is my time. I get up at 6 am, and this, now, after 9 pm is the first time all day I've been done with work, done with chores, and just doing me. You guys. I'm not even asking you to move swiftly or respond to my polite efforts to get around you. Just. Just...
1. Please with the vape clouds, please? I know, I was also impressed when you belched a fat Ghastly-sized puff of Fruit Stripe scented mist into the deathly still summer night air, but you see, I'm running, and it's hard for me to stop breathing, and sometimes, I don't want your blueberry thickness forcing its humid cottoncandy way down my throat. If you were smoking a cigarette, it'd be rude to blow smoke on somebody. I'm just asking for the same consideration, huh?
2. I know you're excited, having fun with your friends, meeting new people, and experiencing this novel "outside" zone, but it's never okay to volunteer unsolicited feedback, even, in fact, positive comments, about a woman's body. Yeah, I got a good ass. I know. It's because I run. Like I'm trying to do now. Please, I'm passing on the left.
3. And this is perhaps the most important: you might not be to old for a cartoon game, but you're way too old to be littering. Come on, now.
No hate! Just some words from one user of a shared space to another! And thanks to all you who are simply enjoying your game, the pretty summer night, and the sweet satisfaction the comes from not being a total asshole.
Love and all other indoor sports,
Jess
P.S.: Your vape pen smells like rotting poptarts and it looks like you're deepthroating a robot dong when you suck on it.
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I take it as a sign of my improving character that seven years ago, I begged an escort on going into a field alone, and now when I'm feeling my way barefoot through semidarkness alone in a forest at Elkhorn, and hear a sound, I just put a hand on my knife, My prettyass perfect sharp-as-ice knife my friends Joe and Fish designed and forged for me.
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